Breathe and Be: What I’m Learning About Softness and Stillness

Lately, I’ve been paying more attention to my breath. Not just the inhale and exhale I do unconsciously—but the intentional kind. The “let me pause before I spiral” kind. The “my chest is tight, and I need to come home to myself” kind.

And I’ll be honest—at first, it felt silly.Like, really, breathing? That’s what’s going to calm me down when everything feels like too much?

But yes… actually, it is.

I used to meet overwhelm with urgency. A problem would pop up, and I’d immediately go into fix-it mode. I didn’t give myself time to feel, let alone to pause. I just moved. Fast. With pressure. With this subconscious belief that sitting still meant I was weak or wasting time.

But I’m learning something new. Something softer. Sometimes the best thing I can do in a moment of chaos isn’t to solve anything at all—It’s to breathe and be.

That’s it. No cape. No rushing. No productivity. Just presence. Just my breath anchoring me back into the moment.

The more I practice this, the more I realize how much I’ve lived in survival mode. Always doing. Always managing. Always carrying.And I know I’m not the only one.

Black women especially—we aren’t always taught how to regulate our nervous systems. We’re taught how to show up strong. How to push through. How to be everything for everyone. But nobody ever really sat us down and said, “Hey… your body feels this too. Let’s care for it.”

So, I’ve been reclaiming that care.

When my heart starts racing, I pause.When anxiety creeps in, I close my eyes and put one hand over my chest. When I feel like I need to “get it together,” I remind myself that it’s okay to fall apart sometimes—and still be whole.

Here’s the truth: softness doesn’t make you weak. Stillness doesn’t make you lazy. Breathing isn’t “doing nothing.”

It’s doing everything your body has been begging for.

So if today feels heavy—If you’re holding your breath without realizing it,If you’ve been performing strength when all you want is to feel safe—

I invite you to just… breathe.Long inhale. Gentle exhale.No expectations. No fixing. No rushing.

Just breathe and be.

That’s more than enough.